22 and the awareness is washing over..

What you cannot hear on that side of the door.

You cannot hear or believe:

  • That it is NOT boring this side of the door.
  • That is gets easier each day.
  • That maybe you will never want to go back to the chains of booze.
  • That you can party on down with grapefruit juice.
  • That there are other ways to self-soothe, get a HIT, feel amazing etc. without a glass of strong stuff.
  • You will be more energetic.
  • You will feel more alive.
  • You will be more interesting.
  • You are caring for yourself like you deserve.

You actually cannot really believe these things while you are still finding excuses to carry on drinking.  It is like we are deaf to reason, because the voice that wants us to carry on is very loud.  Very convincing and such a big liar!

I cannot believe the simplicity of not drinking – once you have got the first few weeks under your belt I guess…. And how much I was not looking after myself when I drank.  I knew that it was hurting me and that it was stealing much more than it was giving, but I just could not let go.  It took me months – since April when I read Allan Carr’s How to Control your Drinking – to push the button.  Four months.  Four months of inner debate which was so draining.

I wish I done this years ago.



Author: barbsfalkiner

Approaching fifty, life about to change and want to try something different....

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